Malapropisms

Gray · 25428. Fri Sep 30, 2005 9:11 am

Wikipedia defines it, rather elegantly, as:

Mr Grue · 25431. Fri Sep 30, 2005 9:14 am

My favourite malapropism of the moment is the perhaps sadly recurrent:

"which led to the loss of so many pointless lives".

I believe I've seen that one on this board not too long ago...

edward3000 · 25450. Fri Sep 30, 2005 10:51 am

for 6 years I have a forklift driver in a whorehouse :)
LE X

edward3000 · 25451. Fri Sep 30, 2005 10:52 am

For 6 years I have been a fork lift driver in a whorehouse,doh,soz

Jenny · 25455. Fri Sep 30, 2005 10:58 am

When my first husband was a little boy, he went home from school one day after the school nurse had been in to give the various injections required, and said, 'Mummy - I've been vulcanised!'

dr.bob · 25458. Fri Sep 30, 2005 11:01 am

I had been driving for 25 years when I fell asleep at the wheel.

Mr Grue · 25560. Sat Oct 01, 2005 6:38 am

I do love a hybrid simile, 'chas:

"Up and down like a bride's yo-yo."
"Smooth as a baby's silk."

samivel · 29258. Tue Nov 01, 2005 5:49 pm

I remember my younger brother once looking out of our house through the letterbox, seeing the postman coming down the street, and coming back to tell our mum. 'How do you know that?' she asked. To which he replied 'I saw him through the chatterbox'

mattdaniels · 29402. Thu Nov 03, 2005 8:02 am

Slightly related - amazing how easy it is to mis-read some website URL's if you capitalise the wrong letters (these are all work-safe if you click on them btw).

http://www.WhorePresents.com/

http://www.ExpertSexChange.com/

http://www.PenisLand.net/

http://www.TheRapistFinder.com/

http://www.PowerGenitalia.com/

http://www.MolestationNursery.com/

dharlequin · 30186. Tue Nov 08, 2005 3:07 pm

I once shared a house with a somewhat pretentious academic, much given to using words that were one or two syllables too long for his grasp. When I pointed this out to him, he insisted that people didn't object to a little solipsism. I had to produce a dictionary in order to persuade him that he meant "solecism".

gerontius grumpus · 35346. Sun Nov 27, 2005 9:13 am

As much use as a chocolate labrador.

Lita · 35348. Sun Nov 27, 2005 9:21 am

gerontius grumpus · 35365. Sun Nov 27, 2005 9:52 am

Sheridan's originals are still good:
[quote]"He's as headstrong as an allegory on the banks of the Nile." (i.e., alligator)

Is this a double malapropism since alligators are not found an the banks of the Nile?

A bit like the way the word malapropism is derived from the name of a character that means something vary similar to that.

Cleverina Clogs · 35373. Sun Nov 27, 2005 10:08 am

I don't know if this is a malapropism or not, but Mother Clogs often says strange things like 'shut the door, and then you can have some more soup'

laidbacklazyman · 35446. Sun Nov 27, 2005 1:19 pm