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pola
874176.  Sun Jan 01, 2012 7:42 am Reply with quote

you missed it


Last edited by pola on Mon Jan 02, 2012 5:38 am; edited 1 time in total

 
djgordy
874180.  Sun Jan 01, 2012 7:57 am Reply with quote

pola wrote:
Christmas is Confusing

Christmas is a confusing time for children. I donít know if you think that?
Cos everything we teach through the year, gets turned upon its hat
Donít talk to strangers or accept sweets, from people you donít know.

I was in Sainsbury's earlier this week and bought some of those Christmas tubes of sweets that were reduced to 50p. The checkout lady said "ooh, mini rolo, they're lovely, have you had any before". I said " No, I don't eat sweets that much but I like to have a few in in case the fancy takes me". I was tempted to add " and to entice the local children" but I thought better of it!

(To be honest, you'd never entice the kids round here with sweets. You'd need a good supply of crack at the very least.)

 
pola
874181.  Sun Jan 01, 2012 8:16 am Reply with quote

Oh what a shame. x My husband got told off for looking at his phone one day wondering why it would not connect to the internet, a woman accosted him and told him to stop taking pictures of her daughter, glad I was stood with him at the time and could put the woman straight

 
PDR
874196.  Sun Jan 01, 2012 9:07 am Reply with quote

djgordy wrote:
I was tempted to add " and to entice the local children" but I thought better of it!


You were right to be cautious - checkout ladies have previous in the "failure to understand a joke" stakes. A few years ago a colleague was doing the weekly supermarket shop accompanied* by his (then) 10-year-old daughter. A few days before this said daughter had tripped over the dog and banged into a door, giving her a beaut of a black eye which by this stage had just got to the peak of livid blackness, and the lady at the checkout asked

"That looks nasty - how did you get that?"

My colleague (being of a witty disposition) responded with

"When I say breakfast at seven I mean SEVEN - not five past", getting a resigned giggle from the daughter (who had given up trying to persuade her dad to stop with the jokes).

At 06:30 the next morning (a sunday) they answered a knock on the door to find two people from social services and two policepersons. It took over two hours to convince them that the only abuse his daughter suffered was in the form of exposure to bad jokes, and they were only FINALLY convinced when Pete was able to show that he'd been 300 miles away from three days prior to the injury until late on the friday evening (he was contracting down south on a monday-friday basis at the time) and the casualty reports confirmed the date and time at which the injury must have occured.

Apparently the checkout lady had reported the matter, and the supermarket had obligingly extracted the credit-card details to provide name and address...

PDR

*(on flute and bass clavichord, since you ask)

 
swot
874214.  Sun Jan 01, 2012 10:33 am Reply with quote

While that may seem silly (particularly as the girl laughed), if he had been attacked by the father, the checkout girl would have been hailed as a hero. I'd assume an actual abuser would have quickly pointed out that she'd walked into a door though.


Quote:
Itís the same as teaching of fairies leaving money, when they lose a little tooth.



Oh come now, there's nothing wrong with a little whimsy in one's childhood. If the fairy doesn't come and give you 50p or whatever the going rate is now, what you have is bits of your face falling out because you're getting older. At least the fairy makes it fun.

How many of us haven't been lied to as children? I don't think I was harmed by being told that if I was making faces and the wind changed, my face would stay that way, or that my head would cave in if I picked my nose has done me any lasting damage. I may have been irritated by the assumption that I was stupid enough to fall for all of that, but I'm over it now.

 
strawhat
874216.  Sun Jan 01, 2012 10:37 am Reply with quote

I was told that the ice cream man played the music when he'd run out of ice cream. Not harmful, but made my parents lives easier!

 
swot
874219.  Sun Jan 01, 2012 10:50 am Reply with quote

I was told that if I sucked my thumb it would make it shrink. It just so happens that my hands aren't exactly the same size (they're pretty close, so I didn't notice for a good few years) but it also happens that I preferred sucking what turned out to be the thumb on the smaller hand, so I believed this long into double figures.

 
PDR
874226.  Sun Jan 01, 2012 10:54 am Reply with quote

no1 school swot wrote:
While that may seem silly (particularly as the girl laughed), if he had been attacked by the father, the checkout girl would have been hailed as a hero.


I don't believe Pete had ever been attacked by his father (although Pete's father was a chemistry professor, and such folk can never be really trusted) - but it was Pete's *daughter* who wore the black eye on the day in question...

:-)

Quote:

I'd assume an actual abuser would have quickly pointed out that she'd walked into a door though.


This is the bit that took two hours of convincing - every protestation from the daughter was just taken as proof that she was protecting her abusive father!

Quote:
If the fairy doesn't come and give you 50p or whatever the going rate is now, what you have is bits of your face falling out because you're getting older. At least the fairy makes it fun.


When we left 50p for my firstborn's shed tooth we were (over breakfast the next morning) firmly asked to advise the tooth fairy that the going rate was £2 these days, and what kind of a mug did the TF take her for...

PDR

 
Bondee
874234.  Sun Jan 01, 2012 11:09 am Reply with quote

PDR wrote:
Quote:
If the fairy doesn't come and give you 50p or whatever the going rate is now, what you have is bits of your face falling out because you're getting older. At least the fairy makes it fun.


When we left 50p for my firstborn's shed tooth we were (over breakfast the next morning) firmly asked to advise the tooth fairy that the going rate was £2 these days, and what kind of a mug did the TF take her for...

PDR


One of my friends went through something similar when her son lost his first tooth. I told her to tell him that the tooth fairy was feeling the bite, just like the rest of us.
It went straight over her head.

 
NinOfEden
874264.  Sun Jan 01, 2012 11:43 am Reply with quote

When my cousin's first tooth fell out, her parents told her about the Tooth Fairy but then forgot all about it! The next night they left her £1 + a very small peice of paper saying 'sorry it's late' in very small writing. XD

 
pola
874294.  Sun Jan 01, 2012 12:46 pm Reply with quote

I lost my front grown up tooth while I was young, there was no money for it, my mother sat me on her knee and pushed it back in place and held me for a long time. The tooth is still there lets say more than twenty years later. Thanks mum x

 
swot
874434.  Mon Jan 02, 2012 6:21 am Reply with quote

What's with the removal of the the OP? Do we have another Mostly Harmless on our hands?

 
pola
874436.  Mon Jan 02, 2012 6:25 am Reply with quote

Whats a mostly harmless?

 
Alfred E Neuman
874440.  Mon Jan 02, 2012 6:42 am Reply with quote

pola wrote:
you missed it


That's mature. Or not...

 
swot
874454.  Mon Jan 02, 2012 6:56 am Reply with quote

pola wrote:
Whats a mostly harmless?


An ex-forummer from a few years ago. S/he had some sort of hissy fit and removed all of their posts.

 

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