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Skinny-shaming

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swot
1015202.  Tue Aug 06, 2013 5:17 am Reply with quote

I'm not sure if this needs its own thread or not, but I read this article/book advert this morning and some of it reflected my thoughts on the subject.

I don't recall any 'shaming' as such, but being my size (I'm short as well as having a slight build) does attract a sod of a lot of vacuous comments and frankly rude questions (on seeing me eating perfectly normally, a school friend asked if I made myself sick to stay thin). I find such comments tedious, and it honestly makes me a bit sad that people think they're complimenting me when they say how thin I am. Not so much because I'm insulted, but because it shows how insecure they are (or at the very least, it shows that they haven't thought it through). That people think being cold all the time, not finding clothes to fit properly, and attracting endless vapid comments is an advantage is enormously sad.

 
sally carr
1015205.  Tue Aug 06, 2013 5:28 am Reply with quote

I'm with you on this, I spent most of my life weighing around 7.5 stones. The heaviest I ever got was about 9 stones when I was pregnant. People felt quite free to pass comments even one asking if I had a terminal illness.
I never wore skimpy clothing in summer because I was aware of my boniness. I have a habit of pushing my sleeves up that started because I wore kids clothes which fitted everywhere but the length of the arms. No VAT though.

 
Awitt
1015211.  Tue Aug 06, 2013 6:08 am Reply with quote

I'm like Swot, 5 foot or so, and skinny, weighing around 45 kgs, but am not underweight. (I weigh myself every 2-3 months on a friend's bathroom scales when I visit them, the number never changes)
With my IBS issues and not being able to eat certain foods now or risk a cramp for hours, I get comments from people who know me well, who know I eat and am not making it up, etc, that 'no wonder you're like that.'

I have many clothes (just packing them up now, in fact, to move house at the end of the month), that are a size 10 or 12, which was the smallest size in that design that I liked, when really an 8 would be good.
My psychologist is the same height and size too so she understands when I talk about this to her.

 
swot
1015219.  Tue Aug 06, 2013 7:24 am Reply with quote

In case anyone's interested, I was 45 kg pre-baby (which, at the height of approximately 1 Toksvig, is at the very lower end of healthy; not ideal, but not dangerous), largely due to IBS and dyspepsia knocking out my appetite for the last ten years, plus specific (delicious, fattening) foods being off-limits because of adverse reactions. It is extremely tiresome being asked if I'm 'on a diet'. I've gone up to 54 kg since getting pregnant and I'm constantly ravenous. I think the two are connected. :)

 
NinOfEden
1015244.  Tue Aug 06, 2013 12:01 pm Reply with quote

I think thinness is just another of those attributes that jumps out at people when they meet you, and then they leap to conclusions.
I get asked if I'm a vegetarian a lot. Appartently I 'look like a vegitarian'.
*shrug*

 
PDR
1015282.  Tue Aug 06, 2013 3:37 pm Reply with quote

NinOfEden wrote:

I get asked if I'm a vegetarian a lot. Appartently I 'look like a vegitarian'.
*shrug*


Not sure what they're trying to tell you, but the only distinctive characteristic allegedly common in vegetarians would be flatulence, as in Shakespeare's timeless sonnet:

"Shall I compare the to a summers day,
For thou art cold, wet and windy..."

:-)

PDR

 
cornixt
1015283.  Tue Aug 06, 2013 4:10 pm Reply with quote

I thought that there was a stereotype of vegetarians looking gaunt and undernourished.

 
swot
1015284.  Tue Aug 06, 2013 4:12 pm Reply with quote

I think there is, particularly if they're vegan.

 
Spud McLaren
1015286.  Tue Aug 06, 2013 4:19 pm Reply with quote

I take it you've all seen the pictures of tets and myself on various threads, always looking painfully thin and pasty.

No, I thought not.

 
Awitt
1015290.  Tue Aug 06, 2013 5:26 pm Reply with quote

I knew a vegetarian 10 years ago and she was always grumpy, had a short fuse. Though I wonder now in hindsight if she was actually half starved.

 
Jenny
1015305.  Tue Aug 06, 2013 9:24 pm Reply with quote

NinOfEden wrote:
I think thinness is just another of those attributes that jumps out at people when they meet you, and then they leap to conclusions.
I get asked if I'm a vegetarian a lot. Appartently I 'look like a vegitarian'.
*shrug*


You're sure they're saying 'vegetarian' and not 'vegetable'? Mind you, I can think of a few vegetables I wouldn't mind resembling. At the moment, I'm more of a potato, but a sufficiently curvaceous carrot would do.

 
AlmondFacialBar
1015317.  Wed Aug 07, 2013 2:39 am Reply with quote

Weirdly enough, none of the vegans in my life are even remotely skinny. They're all between well-built and chunky.

:-)

AlmondFacialBar

 
NinOfEden
1015352.  Wed Aug 07, 2013 7:53 am Reply with quote

PDR wrote:
NinOfEden wrote:

I get asked if I'm a vegetarian a lot. Appartently I 'look like a vegitarian'.
*shrug*


Not sure what they're trying to tell you, but the only distinctive characteristic allegedly common in vegetarians would be flatulence

They say LOOK like, not smell or sound like...
AlmondFacialBar wrote:
Weirdly enough, none of the vegans in my life are even remotely skinny. They're all between well-built and chunky.

Yeah, the only vegan I know is kinda round too.

 
AlmondFacialBar
1015360.  Wed Aug 07, 2013 9:07 am Reply with quote

I don't get that whole body-shaming thing in the first place. Ok, so it's one thing that professional purveyors of conventional beauty want to sell their goods and therefore do their best to plant insecurities in people's minds about their looks. That, however, some people fall for it to the extent described in this thread is both bizarre and depressing. Not to mention unhealthy on more levels than would seem immediately obvious, because for the more well-mannered among us it makes the whole area of weight a complete taboo subject and therefore also prevents us from bringing it up in cases where it maybe should be (say when a good friend is actually over- or underweight enough to worry about their health). Not good, that...

:-)

AlmondFacialBar

 
Efros
1015371.  Wed Aug 07, 2013 10:44 am Reply with quote

Awitt wrote:
I knew a vegetarian 10 years ago and she was always grumpy, had a short fuse. Though I wonder now in hindsight if she was actually half starved.


nah she was probably just a grumpy, easily antagonized individual. I've known a few vegetarians and vegans over the years, and they came in all shapes and sizes and temperaments for that matter. Only had dealings with one who was vehemently "meat is murder", and a fairly impolite "fuck off" settled her chick pea hash. Mind you this is the same woman who was a member of the Cat Protection League and used to come round the labs looking for donations, I told her I was probably one of those you should be protecting cats from. Not really she just pissed me off.

 

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