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FOOD: Cheese Dreams

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eggshaped
337020.  Thu May 15, 2008 10:30 am Reply with quote

Question: Picture the scene – It's almost bedtime but I just fancy a
little snack before retiring for the night. I creep into the kitchen
and open the fridge door. What should I avoid if I want sweet dreams?

Forfeit: Cheese

Answer: ??


Notes:
The fact that cheese gives you nightmares was conclusively and impartially debunked in 2005 by the British Cheese Board, who claim that eating cheese before bedtime actually gives one good dreams. The reason behind the good night’s sleep may be an amino acid called tryptophan that has been shown to reduce stress and induce sleep.

Quite brilliantly, the Cheese Board went one better, and claimed that different cheeses lead you to have different types of dream. Their cheese-board of dreams was as follows:
Cheddar: dreams about celebrities
Red Leicester: about one’s schooldays
Lancashire: about work
Cheshire: no dreams at all
Those who ate stilton had the most unusual dreams, while brie split the sexes with women having relaxing dreams and men having cryptic ones.

Counting sheep is a particularly bad way of getting to sleep, it will just make your insomnia worse. It is much better to think of a relaxing scene, though other tried and tested methods include tensing all the muscles in your body (this exaggerates your later feelings of relaxation) and repeatedly saying the word “the”, which helps to block out all other thoughts.

***

Is there perhaps a better way of wording this? I don't have an answer at the moment.

 
MatC
337030.  Thu May 15, 2008 10:59 am Reply with quote

How about "stimulants," egg? I understand that general advice is that you shouldn't have tea, booze, fags, etc before retiring to avoid disturbed sleep ... which isn't quite bad dreams, of course, but is perhaps close enough?

 
Frederick The Monk
337639.  Fri May 16, 2008 4:27 am Reply with quote

I think we want to keep the question focused clearly on cheese which is the point of the question. I'm not sure I;d consider cheese a stimulant so it might send them away from the heffalump trap.

 
Flash
337687.  Fri May 16, 2008 5:38 am Reply with quote

I don't have the answer to your question question, other than to say that I guess it would be good to get the word 'nightmare' in there somewhere ('What's the most nightmarish meal imaginable?' or something) - but you might want to add something to the note about cheese not being the best thing to bait a mousetrap with.

 
Frederick The Monk
338421.  Sat May 17, 2008 4:32 am Reply with quote

But not making the question too punnish.

 

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